If Game of Thrones’ Characters Were Watches

I love A Game of Thrones. Millions of people share my love.

I love watches. Millions of people, too, share my love.

If you’re only a GOT fan, you might or might not get this.

But if you’re a watch nerd who happens to be a GOT fan, I think you’ll like this.

So, let’s get this on because you know, Winter is coming.

Arya Stark


Beyond the youthful facade of a petite little girl, an iron will sits firmly embedded within Arya Stark. Not one to bend to age old traditions and norms, Arya is a believer that she (and only she) holds the key to shaping her destiny.

Her inclination to prove her readiness to pick up a sword and kick some ass is only overshadowed by a voracity to break away from the protective grasps of her elders.

Arya Stark is the Tudor North Flag


Introduced in 2015 with TUDOR’s first ever in-house movement MT5621, the North Flag was TUDOR’s way of saying, ‘Take us seriously now. We’re ready to roll with the big boys.’

Much like Arya, it’s not exactly a pretty looker (always found the power reserve to be a tad out of place) but for those who cared, it was the insides that mattered.

TUDOR has also gotten a little tired of being left to the sidelines of its older brother, Rolex.

Deep within Arya Stark and the North Flag, the heart of a lion beats steadily, ever ready to bring glory back to the House of Winterfell and TUDOR.

Tyrion Lannister

CS 65 Friday 22nd October 2010


When pun does a word play, pun says, ‘No Tyrion Lannister intended.’

The pygmy king of one-liners and touché sarcasm, Tyrion is a mixed bag of tricks and surprises; the perfect oxymoron of ‘subtly loud’.

When Tyrion makes an entrance, the prospect of a grand performance is almost guaranteed.

Tyrion Lannister is the Seiko Quartz Astron 1969


As they say, the pen is mightier than the sword.

In a world dominated by splendidly crafted mechanical timepieces filled with movements of unparalleled ingenuity, the simple Seiko Quartz Astron – the first quartz wristwatch in the world – showed itself in 1969 and nearly killed the entire Swiss watch industry.

The Seiko Quartz Astron is unromantic and ugly; but it does best what a watch was designed to do: telling accurate time.

Like Tyrion, it doesn’t waste time on niceties and will royally screw you up regardless of your heritage and background.

Fools who belittle either one had best watch their backs.

Lord Varys


‘The Spider’ is a hard man to figure out; even the ‘man’ part is a little elusive.

Draped in silky robes bearing colours and prints of all kinds, yet granted the access of standing in court alongside the mightiest in Westeros, his choice of clothing and coming to being remain as unfathomable as it has been since day one.

That said, the presence he commands is undeniable; be it one met with unconscious respect or fearful disgust.

Lord Varys is the Rolex Daytona ‘Rainbow’

imageDo you need an explanation for this?

Hans Wilsdorf would have died where he stood had this psychedelic trinket arrive while he was still alive.

The Rolex Daytona (designed and inspired by such testosterones charged sporting events: car racing, no less) has suffered the same consequences that made Lord Varys a eunuch.

What happened to the balls on this thing man?

Nobody can truly understand the Rolex Daytona Rainbow. Just like how nobody can truly understand Lord Varys.

They inhabit a world of their own and perhaps, it’s better they stay that way.

Joffrey Baratheon


The eldest son of the Baratheons – best known for exploiting the privileged legacy made possible by an endless legion of good men before him – is a ‘grade A’ prick of the highest order.

Joffrey Baratheon is the personification of the term ‘you hate to love and love to hate’.

Revered only by a one (wo)man strong fan club – his mother – and the consequence of an incestuous relationship, the world secretly prayed for his demise and oh, were they rewarded with a morbidly satisfying scene of young Joffrey choking to death in his own blood.

Joffrey Baratheon is the Daniel Wellington ‘Glasgow’

Image: danielwellington.com


The Daniel Wellington ‘Glasgow’ is as handsome a watch as Joffrey is a young man; but that’s where all the good things end.

It takes all the great design philosophies from true watch companies but credits it to its own brilliance.

In a similar fashion to Joffrey’s true blood line, Daniel Wellington was not named after his father, the creator, but after an English stranger whose existence remains questionable.

While we all know Jamie Lannister provided the seed, we still don’t know who provided Daniel Wellington’s.

Generally frowned upon by the general watch community, we too, watch on to see when the craze of Daniel Wellington will finally end.

Gregor Clegane


Gregor Clegane is big. VERY big.

They don’t call him ‘the mountain that rides’ for looking like a kitten.

And he is bad. What kind of guy sears the face of his own brother upon a flaming pit for fiddling with his toy?

And Gregor is not nice; inside out and outside in. 

Jostled off his horse by the flower knight, Ser Loras Tyrell, in a sanctioned tourney, Gregor lacked the grace to handle defeat and proceeded to upset everyone.

First, by chopping off the head of his horse, followed by attempting to chop off Loras’.

Gregor Clegane is the U-Boat Classico CA925


The U-Boat is big. VERY big.

Not unlike Gregor, it seeks to downplay the inadequacies of its insides by distracting people with a gigantic outside.

Perhaps understanding the futility of being taken seriously by true watch guys, it constantly grows bigger to capture the attention (and eventual spending) of the uninitiated.

Prices aren’t cheap either for the pedestrian movements they use, which makes one wonder what exactly you are paying for.

The mark of true substance is never the grand gesture, but the simple things done well.

Gregor Clegane and U-Boat will do well to remember that.

Want to see more characters? Tell me who in the comments section.

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